Saturday, 3 March 2012

How to make a Coconut Bra [Photo Heavy]

Feeling a little tropical despite the miserable weather? Make a coconut bra!
I went on a "Dog the Bounty Hunter" Pub Golf the other day.  If you've never seen Dog, google it! It is the most entertaining show ever! But for those of you who don't know, the premise is this:

Dog and his (giant) family are bounty hunters in Hawaii where they pay people's bail.  If the people then break their terms of bail, Dog and his family are legally allowed to hunt them down, find their crack pipe, make the step on it, put them in a hummer, council them with Beth (Dog's comically endowed wife), make them cry, give them a cigarette and pray with them.  Then they hand them in to the Police.  And that is what happens, in every episode! It's amazingly formulaic but it works! Anyway, it's hilarious.

So for our pub golf, we were split in two.  One half of the group were Bounty Hunters (cue the plastic guns, handcuffs, quiffed hair, fake tattoos and black wife-beaters) and the others were Hawaiians.

The coconut bra was my idea but was not going to be worn by me, as I was a bounty hunter for the evening, so it was made to fit my boyfriend Greg.  I still made it though, which was great fun!

1. Take one coconut

2.  Pull it's hair off! Start at the beardy bit, it'll give you more purchase.

3.  Using a normal, blunt type knife scrape off the foamy brown bits left behind.

4.  Admire your baldy coconut.  Then go and give it a good wash and scrub in the sink before you get ready to drain it.

5.  Find the 'eyes' at the top of the coconut (this is actually an earlier photo but I didn't have any good photos of the baldy coconut).  Using a nail and a hammer, hammer the nail through all 3 eyes so you can empty out the coconut water.  If you keep hammering until you feel the nail give, you know you're through the coconut flesh (which can be quite thick).

6.  (I don't have any photos of this bit - apologies)  Drain the coconut.  You'll need a bowl to hold it over and catch the water in.  When you turn it upside down it will start to leak but you'll either need to shake it vigourously to get the rest out or you can blow through one of the holes which will push the water out the other two (like blowing an egg). 

Once it's drained, take it to your nearest School of Mechanical Engineering, go to the auto lab and enlist a few members of their Formula Student team.  I am obviously a Mechanical Engineering undergrad and I got the very kind assistance of some boys from UBRacing to help me with the sawing!

7.  Clamp your coconut in a vice and make sure it's really secure!

8.  Starting from the eyes, saw down the coconut following one of the seams.

Once you get to halfway, turn the coconut round...

... And saw again!

When you get all the way through, give the coconut halves to your hungry assistants and equip them with a knife/fork/spoon.

With thanks to Alex and Will for helping me saw my coconut in half.  
Also thanks to Ben for showing me where the drill and goggles live.

9.  Using another vice and a hand drill, drill two small holes on the opposite sides of the coconut halves to the eyes.  You'll put the string through these.
(I don't have a photo of my drilling because its difficult to drill safely and use a camera!)

Watch out for cracks in your coconut shells! I accidentally cracked mine by over-tightening the vice when I was drilling.  Luckily it didn't crack too seriously and it didn't reach the hole.  Had it done, I'm sure superglue could fix it.

10.  Cut about a metre and a half (or two) off your ball of string and knot two knots in the middle.  These mark out how far apart your coconut shells will sit on your chest.

11.  Make the knots really big so they don't slip through the holes.

Thread like so.

12.  Make two more big knots on the insides of the holes in the shells to hold the coconuts in place.  Thread the string through the holes at the sides. This will form your back string.

13.  Take another meter of string for the neck string.  Knot it on the outside of the coconut.  Do the same on the other side.

14.  Admire your coconut bra!

Though it was originally made for Greg, I only had a few photos of him during the night and you can't really see the bra...

So I took this one of me wearing it!  Of course Greg didn't wear it with a skin-coloured leotard underneath but I'm not as much of an exhibitionist.

Ta daa!

Other photos from Pub Golf:
Me and Mark, Bounty hunters
Unfortunatley I don't have many photos of the Hawaiians because they were so good at running away!

Gracie and Matt as Beth and The Dog

1 comment:

  1. Great post! Going to do this for Halloween!!!